he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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