and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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