So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Randomize
