so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.