Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I chose taco bell over sex...
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh