so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?