I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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