So drunk its hurt
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
