Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
