we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
