Do you still have your period?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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