nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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