Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
