Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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