just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize