so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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