She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize