no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
