Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I think my moral compass just broke
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