I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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