2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Randomize
