IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
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He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
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Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
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