Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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