we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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