i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
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ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
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Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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