DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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