Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
