So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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