After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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