So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
