i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
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