just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
