I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
