come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
