I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Randomize
