Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
