i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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