you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
