he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize