Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
