yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
they're like a gay fantastic four
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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