I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
