Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize