that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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