did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
