Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I FOUND THE LEGS
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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