You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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