He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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