omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
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Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
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one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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