Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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