Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize