My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
