what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
