so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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